She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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