My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
Randomize
