So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Randomize