yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
