He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
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