was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize