have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
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