I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
