That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
Banned from zoo.
Again?
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
im dying and naked and this is what youre living with next year.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize
