He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Randomize
