Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Randomize