pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
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