You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Randomize
