just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Randomize
