So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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