I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize