Say something about gay babies.
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
