I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
