My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
