I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
I queefed so loud it echoed.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Randomize
