Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
