Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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