I seem to have left my pride at pride
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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