can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Randomize
