don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Randomize
