Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
Randomize