How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Randomize
