The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Randomize
