She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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