New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
