hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
