I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Randomize
