Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Randomize
