I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
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