People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Randomize
