Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
