Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Randomize
