We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Holy shit dude........stairs
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