yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
For someone only wearing socks and a cast, I felt reallyy overdressed
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize