Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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