Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
