they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
