No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
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