Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
I slept with one of the directors so you would get a good price on the ballroom for your reception. I'm the best MOH. You owe me bitch
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Randomize