In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
