i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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