So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
The best part of Easter was watching all his colorblind cousins try to find the eggs.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
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