Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Randomize
