But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
