David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
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