Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
