Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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