my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
