you turned your livingroom into a bong?
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
